Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Stop & Stare & I Cried

two weeks ago went for the interview

ok got the job

without much troubles

 

so after the summer break

i will be given a new life

of a LOL

LITTLE OL

9-5 Mon-Fri

it will do me good

 

today first day at work

given a desk

but hardly work here

because have to work

at the public workstation

for the computerreflection

 

my boss was saying

hang on a moment

and they were gossiping behind me

so they said

this is Monday Blue

 

i can feel the strong presence

of office politic in here

once they were looking for a doc

a Malay girl couldn’t find it

so the two who found said

haiz this is Malay

wth

 

my haggard bags piles and piles of files

 

it so happened that

sis and her whole Ng family

were at the firm

reading of will

of her belated mother-in-law

haha isn’t it familiar

if you are a tvb fan

 

but no worries

their are a happy family case

whole family went down to my house

for lunch after the will-reading

they know the big boss well enough

but the connection between me

and them are unknown

 

1st task was Word doc

still ok.. going well

my nightmare begun later on

told my boss i never use typewriter before

she said just trial and error

figured everything on my own

and i retyped the 2 pages doc

for 5 times

 

typewritten words look

very retro, lively

but don’t mess with them

even your wpm on keyboard is great

the typewritter keyboard

requires a shooting skill

shoot the key down hard and fast

otherwise there will be spaces or overlaps

out of place rejected!! again!!

 

the pantry

still ok lar

the pantry that's the LOL

 

the office

still with CNY decor the public work station, where i was typing

 

when i looked into the calendar

all i was concerned with

are the red squares

is it the same for all the LOL?

just staring at those red one stamps and more stamps

 

lunch with another two colleagues

met another colleague who came back

from the 12pm slot

“hey didn’t you ask the other one out?”

“her slot is 12, it’s supposed to be you!!”

again…

 

our conversations were

less than ten sentences in total

kopitiam

 

i need greens to heal my

imbalanced soul

green lunch

 

after the typewriting was done

another nightmare

filling up a certain forms

clues are from all the past docs

SPA, form 16, form 14, 2B

endless list

some in English

some in Malaychecking through housing docs

 

i couldn’t help but

to countdown to 5.30pm

this is the only first day

how torturous it would be

to countdown days till the end of the month

 

i need the sun

more than ever

was crying in the car

if this doesn’t suit me

then what will

where is my destination

finally off

 

continued back home

till my eyes were all swollencried till so pig-like

 

stop and stare

i know i am going

but i got no where

there’s always a call

if you have read Jack London before

 

but the voice is too weak

and i can’t even track the direction

it is coming from

 

Stop and Stare / One Republic



Stop and Stare / One Republic


This town is colder now 
I think it's sick of us
It's time to make our move
I'm shakin off the rust
I've got my heart set
on anywhere but here
I'm staring down myself
Counting up the years
Steady hands, just take the wheel...
And every glance is killing me
Time to make one last appeal...
For the life I lead

Stop and stare
I think I'm moving but I go nowhere
Yeah I know that everyone gets scared
But I've become what I can't be
Oh...Stop and stare
You start to wonder why you're here not there
And you'd give anything to get what's fair
But fair ain't what you really need
Oh, can u see what I see

They're tryin to come back
All my senses push
Un-tie the weight bags
Sometimes now I never thought I could...
Steady feet, don't fail me now
Gonna run till you can't walk
But something pulls my focus out
And I'm standing down...

Stop and stare
I think I'm moving but I go nowhere
Yeah I know that everyone gets scared
But I've become what I can't be
Oh...Stop and stare
You start to wonder why you're here not there
And you'd give anything to get what's fair
But fair ain't what you really need
Oh...What u need Oh
What u need What u need What u need
Stop and stare
I think I'm moving but I go nowhere
Yeah I know that everyone gets scared
But I've become what I can't be
Oh, do u see what I see...

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