class ended at 12.30 today
we hanged around outside the classroom
for awhile.. talking
he hanged around too
with some other people
then we just walked by
and I got reprimanded
for not saying Hello to him
claiming that I am being too cold
it’s a weird thing huh
I am not that kind of girl
who will walk up to you
and say Hello
especially when surrounded with
people I am not so familiar with
and it’s a funny thing
then I would just text him
asking him what is he up to
yes.. my face-to-face social skill suck
that why sometimes
people will take it as
I am an arrogant good-for-nothing
who are not even bothered to say hello
so two of us
me and my bitch
spent three hours sitting
talking and talking non-stop
about what?
loads of things
and on a serious note
about religion and race
on a not so serious note
gossiping and bitching
religion and race
why would we care about all these
if we were to fall in love
I mean
it’s about two people
after all you are not going to talk about
religion and race everyday
when you are dating
and for me
I believe in religions’ teachings
but not rituals
religion can be part of your personality
but it shouldn’t be imposed on you
just like music
some may like Pop, Jazz, Rock
or you can even equally like a few genres
why would we have to be labeled with a religion
from the chat
came to the conclusion that
I am a self-conscious person
deep inside
I seriously don’t mind
anything everything
let it be
but on the outer layer
I care what people think about me
a lot a lot
what if they think I am a lousy shit
preferably
I like to be left at my own corner
being an open-minded free thinker
but I simple can’t
nobody can.. perhaps
no man is an island
neither do two men
you live in a society
made up of variety
regarding relationship
for me.. it has never been easy
and smooth-sailing all the while
it’s always trial and error
but this time round
I seriously don’t know
I ponder over it a lot
but sometimes
can’t help letting my mind wandering to him
I keep asking myself why
now I realize the situation
always portrayed in novels, TV etc
liking somebody you are not supposed to
can be quite troublesome, sometimes
but maybe it’s not as bad as it seems to be
because in this world
it can be friend/lover/nothing
but how about something in between?
friend with passion for a lover
lover with nothing at all, maybe money
if it is a trial and error
what if I fall too deep in
but I end up hurting myself
and the other party
no pain no gain
but what would I gain
at the end of the day
memories and sighs
the good long talk
ended at 3.30 pm
I am good at talking
only in small circle of two
because … yes
I am an ANTI-SOCIAL
but it is a weird thing
an anti-social doesn’t like shopping
an anti-social wouldn’t be bothered to dress up
but I do
because…
I am an anti-social with self-consciousness
outside my housemate is quarrelling
with the Singaporean boyfriend
over the phone again
shouting and shouting
she is doing this on weekly basis, I think
that’s definitely not something I like
such a waste of energy
if I am mad
I would rather cut the line
laze on my corner (like now)
and start blogging about it
an anti-social with self-consciousness
is falling into a quicksand now
save her please
Friends, Lovers or Nothing / John Mayer
| Friends, Lovers or Nothing / John Mayer Now that we are over Only when we want is not Friends, lovers, or nothing You whisper 'Come on over' Think we'll never fall into Friends, lovers, or nothing Friends, lovers, or nothing |