Saturday, March 15, 2014

[Repost]: How Highly Sensitive People Can Learn to be Vulnerable

BY JENNIFER KASS
MARCH 14, 2014 4:00 AM EDT

via Mind Body Green

JenniferKassHeroImage-850x400

I spent the first couple decades of my life

trapped in emotional patterns that were

destructive to my health, happiness, and relationships.

Anger was my drug of choice, and I was addicted.

 

I was so sensitive to the way

the world was operating,

with so much unnecessary pain and suffering

taking place and a paradigm in which

everything seemed upside down:

 

work really hard in a job you can't stand

so you can retire and do nothing but

lie on a beach;

 

eat junk so you can go to the doctor and

take a pill to get fixed;

 

be selfish, skeptical and snarky to fit in,

as opposed to being

kind, sensitive and compassionate.

 

Nothing made sense,

but I wasn't fully conscious of

what was so upsetting to me and

I lashed out in dysfunctional ways.

 

The passion within me was blocked and

expressed inappropriately through anger.

 

Being highly sensitive doesn't mean

we also have to be highly emotional or

filled with anxiety.

 

These were reactions to a planet that

doesn't always support humanity's

well-being and happiness,

but when I became ready and willing,

I began to overcome the real obstacle

I was faced with:

 

Fully identifying with my

negative thoughts and emotions,

giving them all my power by

believing them to be real.

 

When I began learning through

the spiritual truths that

only love is real and that

we must unlearn fear —

 

that we are not our thoughts, emotions,

our body, bank account, relationship status and

all the other external aspects of life —

I started to get a grip on reality.

 

My emotional patterns were rooted in fear and

caused me great pain and

the experience of always

feeling "hurt" by someone else.

 

Where there's fear,

there's anger, sadness, hurt, pain, suffering.

But when we begin to take responsibility for

how we feel, rather than blaming others or

the harsh world in which we live,

 

we can recognize that

the fear isn't real and

the illusion is something that's

meant for us to overcome;

 

we begin to awaken to a new way of

seeing things and

we transform our lives

from the inside out.

 

Spirituality is shifting from fear to love.

As we change, we change the world.

 

The spiritually mature individual will

need to be vulnerable.

When I began to make the shift from

fear to love

(this was a conscious moment-to-moment choice I made)

my anxiety and emotional patterns

healed and dissolved, and

 

I was able to step into a space of true vulnerability,

which wasn't emotional or painful —

quite the opposite.

 

I've learned that my greatest power lies

in my vulnerability.

Because it's when I'm standing vulnerable and

completely open that

I am in my truth.

 

I am in a space of love and

not in a space of fear;

it's only in this space that

I can be truly seen and therefore

connect in a meaningful way with others.

 

It is in our vulnerability that

we have the power to effect more positive change,

because as we empower ourselves

we empower others.

 

It's one of the paradoxes of life:

When we have no walls, nothing can hurt us.

 

There's a misconception that

being vulnerable causes pain,

but it's in our vulnerability that

we are safe and powerful beyond measure.

 

When we stand in a space of love,

we are self-approved, self-accepted, and

nothing can harm us.

 

We see through the fear-based illusions of

not feeling worthy or good enough.

It's only when we close our hearts and

put up protective barriers that

we are at the mercy of everyone and

everything around us —

from this place we become victims of

our circumstances and

give away our power by

letting external things and

other people control how we feel.

 

When we begin to understand that

it's our perception of

what's happening around us that

can hurt us or free us rather than

the actual external circumstance,

we are never victims of

someone else's thoughts, opinions,

actions or judgments.

From this place of clarity

we can either walk away from

a toxic situation,

step up for ourselves or

see through our ego's illusions of

feeling like a victim.

It's this high sensitivity to

feelings, emotions and our external environment

that is what shakes us awake more quickly,

if we become willing.

 

Today,

I am deeply grateful and humbled by

the experience my soul chose in

this lifetime, because

I started taking responsibility for

my own happiness.

 

A couple months ago,

I was at dinner with a new friend

who is a well-known

meditation teacher and Ayruvedic master.

 

He asked for my hand and

began to take my pulse

— a form of diagnosis — and

he looked at me and said,

"You have no anger in you."

 

I beamed and nodded,

telling him that

it's one of the miracles

I've experienced on my spiritual path.

 

He responded, "

Don't ever lose your fierceness, though."

Oh, I won't.